- Page 2: Consider splitting bullet point three into two sentences, it's awkwardly long with so many "and" joins. Suggestion: "The social relationships we build at FUDCon will help our work in Fedora go more smoothly and help build more trust within our community. Our relationships are as important as the technical achievements we make here."
- Page 2: "... provided to you as a convenience and do not indicate..." Remove the comma before the "and".
- Page 3: Either I mistyped http://ur1.ca/7018c or it's pointed to the wrong location. Actually, none of the ur1.ca links seem to be working for me.
- Page 4: "The legal drinking age in Arizona" Missed copy/paste from last year's FUDCon, we're in Virginia this year :)